the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
So shortly after drunk sex...she starts crying and saying..." you don't care about me, you never do anything nice for me" so I called her a cab
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
I feel like I should come with a warning like "Orgasm free since 1983"
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.
7:26 bus just came. I am sweatier than Louie Anderson eating chili in a sauna
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
I lost the right to judge tonight
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
I'll start working on my manners when you stop using please and thank you in the bedroom.
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
Randomize
