Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
Drunk. Just jacked off for the third time in an hour. I love not being Catholic anymore.
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
Remember when we used to share painkillers at parties? Now we're dealing in blood pressure pills. Oh, how the mighty have fallen.
I'll just be here. Naked. Eating tots and jello like a muh fuggin G
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
In last nights drunken stupor i apparently purchased a luxury travel package for two to Australia. So uh...get a passport and clear your schedule for next month
If blow jobs were a super power she'd be in the Justice League.
If he doesn't get here soon I'm taking off my thong and eating his dinner.
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
Randomize
