it's my fault, I passed out instead of getting up to pee.
so, totally just picked up a pack of red bull, and some magnum condoms and the old woman at the register's tone went from "hi blah how are you" to "oh....how YOU DOIN'?" she knew what was up
She said I could do whatever I wanted to her. I pumped for 20 seconds, apologized, rolled over and passed out. I sit directly across from her at work. Awkward?
They should really pass out barf bags in church
Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
This morning I proved to myself and all the kids on the playground that I can't puke and drive.
She rolled over this morning and asked "did you refer to my vagina as splash mountain last night? "
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
My gyno overestimated by 3 TIMES the amount of sex we have per week. First of all, he must think I'm a freak. Secondly, I think we should catch up.
Dude, did you know, your blood is contaminated with over 17 non-beer fluids?
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket but I got a grade A fucking and don't particularly care.
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