I'm gonna get wrecked tn I might have to keep my phone at home cause I'm sure ill send you really weird txts
If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
how was your night?
well, i just purchased 'sorry for being a drunk whore' cupcakes. how do you think my night was?
And then he said "my dick isn't hard enough and your tits aren't big enough for this to work"
I left a cheeto on everyone's car trailing to the house i'm at, hanzel and gretel style.
I just found out my birth date is Pick Your Poison Day. Goodbye, conscience, forever. I was born to live like this.
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
It Amazes me that I was able to drunk update my status in Spanish last night.
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
there is a naked boy in my bed & you just need to kick him out because i do NOT want to see him when i'm sober.
Randomize
