I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
You know why I moved here? No public intoxication law. A cop just helped me from my bent over vomit pose, asked if I was ok, and gave me a ride home.
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
You were fucked up like a footballbat trying to eat gum off your shoe. And that wasn't even the nights lowest point.
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
i don't know if this is a cannibal joke or a sexual innuendo, and i think that's a beautiful description of our relationship.
We got drunk and crashed a fifty year old woman's birthday party for the food. Whoops.
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
I shouldn't have that kind of responsibility when the prospect of being high is readily available. All I could do was hula hoop and smoke cigarettes last night. My remembrance of anything important was out the window.
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
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