Solid performance last night. Wanna be fuck buddies?
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
Results of pregaming honors college basketball social: 18 points, 3 blocks, and 3 flagrant fouls leading to 2 broken bones on former valedictorians. I'm doing this more often.
If drinking before honors events and injuring our universities brightest doesn't get you kicked out of the program, you're not trying hard enough.
Tis the season to puke in grandma's bathroom
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
I really thought I'd be the only alcoholic drinking alone in my car at noon in the Lowe's parking lot. Passed out dude in the car next to me begs to differ.
Who knew that the guy I fucked on your front lawn during welcome week freshman year would turn out to be my husband
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
I KEEP THINKING INAPPROPRIATE SEXUAL THOUGHTS ABOUT YOU AND I AM SORRY.
You peed on a flamingo?!?
Randomize
