on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
I am telling you that nothing wakes you up like stomach acid exiting your nostrils at 10AM
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
I never thought that taking apart multiple age 5 and under puzzles would be part of my house party clean up process.
Yeah, sorry about that. I just couldn't stop.
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
Banged my ex-wife last night...so I belong to that club now.
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
getting my period the day i moved was my bodies way of saying 'congratulations youre not leaving town with anybodies babies!'
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