I'm pretty hammered, I'll elaborate tomorrow
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
I was freaked out. No man over 50 is allowed to touch me. Ever. Unless you're Michael Bolton. Then please do.
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
I remember eating bacon bits off your chest that night... I'll never look at bacon pizza the same way
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
Come over. Bring drugs. My sister is making cookies. She took Valium. They should be badass cookies.
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