next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
You nicknamed her "lazy eye" and were screaming across the bar at her to buy you a drink...
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
You can duct tape yourself to me so we dont lose you and you dont have to celebrate your birthday alone
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
he's gonorrhea incarnate
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
On a scale of one to Harambe, how attached were you to your goldfish?
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
Randomize
