grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
shut up. I wear heels bigger than your dick
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
We fucked in his mom's shower and all I could think about was being too old to be sneak banging while someone's mom was out of town and how much mildew was on the shower curtain. Fuck you, Adulthood.
He stopped mid-sex to read the subtitles on a Korean movie we had playing in the background.
How high are you?
I feel like breakfast can just fly into my mouth
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
shes making a cheerios necklace using dental floss 'just in case' she gets the munchies later
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
Holy high batman
The hairdryer was like a fuckin obstacle course
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
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