The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
saw "Pah-jure" lube. Thought of you. Wearing the same clothes to work tomorrow.
I stayed in, ate a pint of Hagen daas and watched a movie about aids. Soooooooo single.
1. Call me if you need ANYTHING. 2. If you get tag teamed, I want details.
i was rollin on her like bob the builder
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
Don't worry we found her. Somehow she ended up on my roof with 2 bar stools
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
I know you`re my best friend, but when i wake up with this bad of a hangover and no memories of last night, i dont want to see your tits ad my background.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seriously? We dated for 2 weeks. TWO. And I've crushed his soul and put out the light in his dark world? What the actual fuck.
Yeah, well. That's what you get for dating a musician.
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
if masturbating while stoned isn't called "weed whacking" then i just don't know how to live my life anymore
I quit life. I got pulled over on my way to work and they towed my car and dropped me off at work in a cop car
I don't know if your celebrity crush has ever asked you for nudes, but it's fucking awesome
I just opened a pickle jar stoned as fuck. I clapped for myself. I feel like wonder woman.
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