Just saw a policeman use his lights to go through a red light only to turn them off and go to Sonic...
U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
I just watched a girl use a tall boy Coors as a rolling pin to make christmas cookies
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
Since you're going to wake up and see one bajillion missed calls from me, I just want you to know that's a perfectly reasonable number. Now come downystairs.
tonights mission is daddy issue patrol - we wear old spice and drink gin martinis and see who reacts.
Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger.
I need to start using my boobs for good instead of weed. Although really they're kind of the same thing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I ate the crust off the pizza and left the rest in the box. Even I would hate me.
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
I am beginning to doubt your commitment to my making poor choices tonight
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
I just came in my own mouth don't ask me how cuz it really hurt and felt good at the same time.
Randomize