I'm going to rape someone's good day.
I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
Guess which guy you've blown just made me sandwich at subway?
The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half.
You told her dad that you were gonna "superman that ho" I love the first impressions you make
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
You are in a fancy European city. The best way to truly experience the city is through Tinder
She paid me 300 bucks to spank her and call her Baby Jane. Then we drank half a bottle of sippin whiskey. I'd call it a twelve out of ten.
THEY'RE TEXTING LIKE MIDDLE AGED SOCCER MOMS WHAT DO I DO
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
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