I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
Shark Week may as well be Shark Weed.
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
Thinking about bringing a vibrator to the tanning bed...kill two birds with one stone right?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
WELP I KNOW THE HAPPY HOUR DRINKS WERE GOOD BECAUSE MOM JUST INFORMED ME I AM THE RESULT OF POKED HOLE IN THE DIAPHRAGM
I was randomly pulled aside to have my bag checked. It had 50 condoms in it.
I’m traumatised. Bring vodka and condoms.
You literally snort drugs up your nose and you’re questioning the brand of the multivitamin right now?
Drunk me is having trouble keeping up with sober me's standards
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