i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
I found him crying and drunk, in my closet holding a picture of Tyler Perry. He managed to say"he's just so many people"
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
Thought I was doing makeup today for a photo shoot for a short film. WRONG. Try I'm on the set for a Fucking Sci-Fi PORN.
he had shaved armpits. I repeat: HE SHAVED. HIS. ARMPITS! First hookup of 2014 and it's with a weirdo. Alcohol:1 Me:0
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
All I ever do is give guys anxiety problems and flaccid penises.
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
I'm drinking on a Thursday because I can
Today is Wednesday you jobless drunk
I just found out how I got home last night. The bartenders found me sitting in the brush peeing and called me a cab. Have you seen my underwear?
Randomize
