How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
Please, let me fuck your mom
The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
How do I tell my mom that she just went to the gym with my water bottle filled with vodka...
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
My addiction to golf is getting out of hand....I just caught myself swinging my dick like a putter while peeing.
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
The last time I thought I had a UTI, I ended up having herpes. Sooo.. This time in preparing myself for cancer or death.
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
This guy kept trying to use "see? I'm clean. Cleared by the plasma place today." as a pick up line. This is not okay.
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
Just puked most of my soul out..
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
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