Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
I looked at my own cervix.
I am a mess. Weirdest thing: I woke up with a hammer under my pillow. No idea why.
A 12 year old Canadian kid said I was a pussy for only buying a 28-pack. I fit in better in this country.
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
It's like the god of all feather dusters, but for your vagina
It really is the softest mustache
Burnt my ear trying to use the bathroom blow dryer as a telephone.
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
Also I'm at the pub and there are old lady pirates gyrating on a pole. I wish you were here.
how did you set a fucking salad on fire????????
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
He texted me at 4:30 in the morning saying "I'm not drunk but I think you're beautiful" and then a facebook message at 6 am saying "hi" and the subject was "oh"
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
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