Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
Omg alex and i were cooking weiners on a campfire and a bear came and i am waayyy too high for this
yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
Somehow last night, my dad got me so drunk that I ended up throwing up on the couch, turning the cushions over to hide it, and going to sleep on them.
Now we are really drunk and her 17 yr old cousin is shitfaced. He may or may not have proposed a toast to octopuses and double fisting. And we just drank to Mexico.
If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
Just re-gained consciousness in the freshman girls dorm. Normally this would be awesome but I'm on the floor surrounded by chicks doing their homework. This makes me uncomfortable but I don't think they know I'm awake yet. If I b-line for the door can you come get me?
New rule: gentleman callers are required to bring me gifts of beer when coming over to court you. Tell the monster jam dudes so they know.
Drunk me made out with someone's girlfriend last night, was invited to their place for a semi-threesome, and then walked home at three am. Can't decide if this is better or worse than drunkenly challenging everyone to taekwondo sparring matches...
The bottle of Jameson may have been a bit aggressive for a Sunday cookout.
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
I just told 2 of my vibrators "I love you." I seriously need some dick.
Little girl was fucking around on the train and completely ran her head into a pole. Totally burst out laughing as she cried. Her mom was not amused. I don't think I should be a Mom. EVER.
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