Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
After skinny dipping in your pond, I think me and tequila have added a whole new dynamic to our relationship.
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I brought two seashells to Lowe's, do you think that they'd drill two holes in each shell for me? I need to be a mermaid on Saturday...
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
Recycling my beer bottles from breakfast counts for earth day, right?
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah she let me pull the goalie and wear my USA flag like a cape since it was the first day of the world cup
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
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