I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
This unplanned pregnancy thing is really taking all the fun out of football season.
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
Is it penis luge time yet?
you know you have a brother who cares when he hands you a piece of pizza before you pass out from too many bong hits
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
After the keg stand you collapsed, hit your head on the floor, started seizing and after 20 seconds got back up and said "hah, I remember my first beer"
I have not brushed my hair. I'm wearing a yoga hoodie. I look like I slept in a gutter somewhere. Today is going to be a good day.
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
My mom just woke me up with a cowboy hat and sunglasses on. It's 7 am and she's drunk.
Randomize
