It's like a parade of train wrecks.
I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
Send me another check for the tickets. I scratched out "anal wax" and now the bank won't take it.
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
Can I use your baby to go shoplifting?
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
She swallowed the key to the cuffs, I've been having to explain the pink fuzz all morning.
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
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