You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
you traded sex for a burrito?
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
We are possibly on our way, unless we see the limo full of strippers.
guess who's bored in chemistry researching how to sneak weed through airport security in her vagina?
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
Remember that time we became friends because I shotgunned a Tall Boy in your bathroom?
Those memories are both hazy and awesome.
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
I recorded his orgasm, set it as his ringtone, and called him while they were singing happy birthday to his mom. Yeah, revenge is sweet.
If you say no to drinking on a Monday then I'm going to take you to the hospital for a MRI
My bra is still on the porch...I'm leaving it as a reminder to get my shit together.
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
Randomize
