i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
I don't know why girls would even talk to someone as drunk as I was.
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
Gym?
Sweet baby Jebus, no. I'm Motley Crue hungover. This must be how it feels to rail a line of ants.
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
I'm not asking for life coaching, I'm just asking if you know where I left my underpants.
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
I would just like to say that I was the one who said that we should find scissors, when they were cutting your hair with a kitchen knife. I am responsible.
I still feel bad for it, even though I technically only videotaped it and helped will to distract the questioning neighbor
so apparantly i made out with 24 santas last night...and an elf...and a stoner
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