woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
The only way im leaving this casino is in a golden chariot or an ambulance
my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
Convinced the bartender that I'm a congressman. Free Drinks. God bless America.
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
First and foremost she's my friend, but she's also a mistake I make when I'm drunk
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
Food lion is just a portal. Cheetos are the goal. Its like not banging a super hot chick cause she is french. She still has the same parts just from a different box.
Now I am going to fly my toy helicopter in the dark.
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
nobody put me to bed and I ended up peeing on a tree and got written up
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
Randomize
