Cab driver just said he likes mutual masturbation in the cab. Um
I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
Lost my credit card. M has a bottle of blood in her pocket from a hobo.
Can we have a celebratory fuck now that the lockout is over?
You're the best girlfriend ever.
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
Thanks to you I just drunkenly spot washed a Star Wars hoodie, at midnight on a Friday. If there is a greater level of nerdiness I do not know of its existence
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
Randomize
