he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
I am watching the symphony and have decided that violin players probably give really good hand jobs.
I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
We haven't even moved into the apartment yet and she has already screwed two of our neighbors. This is going to be the longest 12 month lease of my life.
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
Big girls don't cry they get day drunk
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
I'm going to miss recovering from hangovers on the beach. Rolling around in my dorm bed and watching Friends reruns is just gonna feel like slumming it.
These tits shall not be calmed
Went to bed in my room fully clothed, woke up naked in the kitchen with the dog looking unamused.
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
He climbed on the counter and announced it was time for something called The Cocktacular and all the girls immediately left. He cockblocked the entire fraternity!
Randomize
