you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
Two hours into move in day and the ambulance is here already.
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
I could only remember yelling "rip it down" as he ninja jumped off the bed, kicked the wall, and superman punched the fire alarm off the ceiling.
I've always wondered why you never put the hotel room in your name...
Just so you know my hand is still healing from where you drunkenly clawed me last Saturday
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
The last person that asked me out got pushed down an escalator
Randomize
