K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
I'm always impressed by your drunken ability to quickly gauge how long it's been since you've shaved and whether or not your prospective hook up will care.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
I asked for a dramatic "funeral" look for my makeup. They judged me.
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I can't go home with anyone tonight bc I stuffed my bra
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
I'm sitting on your porch drinking wine from the bottle. Just so your new neighbors know what kind of people are in the neighborhood
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
i opened the door and you were passed out on my doorstep wearing ugly shorts and cuddling a pinnapple, i dont know what happened to you.
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
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