I hid a 6pack in the microwave for later
I knew I liked you
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
There needs to be a crayon color for how blue my balls are
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
it's like getting dryhumped by a chainsaw in the very best possible way
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
I know it must have been a hard break up. Are you okay?
Oh yeah, I'm fine dude. My vaginas heart is broken though. I feel bad for her, you should give her a call sometime.
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
I just spent 45 minutes and a really well-put together Power Point trying to convince her to use my dog as baby Jesus in her church's play.
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
Randomize
