What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
She uses my penis to point at the tv when we talk about the shows. I love her
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
I want to celebrate with you...
There's nothing I'd like more than a celebratory "The guy I'm doing just found out he's not a baby daddy" dinner.
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
Just called a girl a cunt over peanuts. I think we both know it wasn't just about the peanuts.
I asked him why the bed was wet and got.."well there are two options... and its not you."
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
They already have a joint checking account. She's got his balls in her purse! What's next, a shared Facebook account?
Last night you were prentending to be a broom stick...you were laying on the floor and humming the Harry potter song.
I don’t have the time, patience, or blood alcohol level to deal with her.
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
Drinking is such a hassle. I wish I could just press a button and be drunk.
Randomize
