i told my grandma i broke up with my boyfriend. her reply " you need to play the field more anyway"
Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
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So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
You should've stopped drinking when you started asking people for bites of tequila.
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
He just asked me if I'd be interested in couples therapy. Fuck my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.
I can measure my amount of vomit in solo cups.
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
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