I pretty much can't stop smiling when I talk to you. Even when you talk about disease and infectious diarrhea.
she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
I just took a dump to end all dumps. Other dumps have already written ballads about it. It was the Armageddon dump. Bruce Willis was there, it was awful.
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
Hindsight: Dressing up in nothing but a bra, booty shorts, and police tape made for the most awkward walk of shame of my life.
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
I smell like Dick and happiness
Why are there 17 orders of shrimp lo mein in the bathtub?
Totally writing my paper on the toilet. Makes me miss you.
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
Randomize
