To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
I am so high I am beginning to unironically like Vanessa Carlton.
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
The magic cards should have been the first clue. The comments that I have "amazing birthing hips" and that I'm "beautiful in a child bearing sort of way just sealed his fate.
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
Why am I sticky / covered in baby Tylonel?
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
Would it kill us to punctuate. That last text took me 5 min to read
My girlfriend is talking to my ex-boyfriend at the bar right now. I REPEAT, GIRLFRIEND IS TALKING TO EX BOYFRIEND RIGHT NOW. GET ME THE FUCK OUT OF THIS PLAACE
WELL THEN WHAT DAY IS IT?!?! This whole having to choose between ruining my future and ruining my liver is totally killing my vibe
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
The progression was banging a stripper banging an unemployed stripper banging a sexual entrepreneur quarantining with benefits totally fucking whipped. Get it right dude
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