why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
I left a care package of Jack Daniel's, pancake mix and porn in your apartment. Merry fucking Christmas.
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
My g-ma saw your dick-pic and wants you to know I've got a keeper. She says her big whopper died in Korea. Good thing g-pa is still asleep.
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
Stop recording sex noises and setting them as my ringtones. This time it was at a funeral
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize
