It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
I cant believe that bitch gave me herpes. she said those bumps were just a part of the natural landscape
wait, did she really refer to her vagina as a landscape?
why are you more concerned about her word choice than the fact that I HAVE FUCKING HERPES
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
I'm laying in the fetal position on the floor of my kitchen eating potato salad with my fingers. Please come over with some real food and keep me company.
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
Randomize
