his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
Bad news. Pictures just stimulated my memory and i just realized the stripper I hooked up with this weekend tasted like pizza.
just passed out again, this time at a subway. On a positive not they gave me a free sandwich, pretty sure out pity but at this point i don't care
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
His phone pocket dialed me while he was crapping. He was quietly singing stayin alive and possibly passing his intestines.
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
Just bc you put "its cute" at the end of it doesn't change the fact that u have called me a vag twice this morning and its only 10:03
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
Randomize
