that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
i just made my mom cry by blowing spit bubbles.
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
Just saw him riding in a basket on the front of a bike trying to feed the other guy beer. He screamed 'PARTY BIKE BITCHES!' at me as they rode past.
I lied. He's hitting on a drag queen now. Should I rescue him or take pictures?
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
She made me sing happy birthday to myself at the urinal.
Code red. She won't talk to me. Maybe it has something to do with her raccoon eyes. Perry said there was a brief moment of towel fighting until you passed out. Did you draw the turtle on my ass?
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
I swear to god there was like a 2-second timespan in which he went from laughing to coughing, hiccuping, and subsequently projectile vomiting into the grass. There is literally a line in the grass, about 2 yards long, of his puke. It was more impressive than disgusting to be honest. And then he just shrugged and said "I have no idea where that came from."
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
I'm dressed as a caveman and drunk so that's not really an option
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
Randomize
