Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
The only reason I kept his number in my phone for so long is so that hed pay for my abortion.
just jacked off with my ROTC uniform on. boy i feel like an american.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i found a twelve pack under my bed. and a six pack in my closet. I'm like a fucking alcoholic squirrel.
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
Be subtle and tell lucas that he should sleep here tonight. And by subtle, i mean show him this text...
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My butt remains clenched, sir.
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
But actually he solved 40% of my life problems just in one dicking
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
I think my roomie is silently judging me for spraining my foot by having sex in a bounce house
so the bounce house and tequila was good idea then?
Randomize