my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
Decided to write a book called "girls don't poop and other myths I wish I still believed in"
Holy jesus god. My teeth taste like street.
HER PREGGO ASS BROUGHT SPEGHETTI-O'S... IN HER PURSE.
You need Jesus. Or a midol and a snickers. Whichever.
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
Let us do this. Tomorrow night is thirsty Thursday. Let us drink whiskey from the bottle and have men in plastic gloves inscribe permanent images of each others faces onto our buttocks.
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
I never thought it would be so hard to find a power hour partner at 2 on a Wednesday
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
In my defense I didn't know there was concrete on the other side of that fence when I tossed him over it.
You're both fucking idiots and this is why I should never let you two drink alone.
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