i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
you put your hands over the taxi driver's eyes and shouted GUESS THE WAY TO THE CLUB
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
I heard a crunch while giving him head. I looked up and he was eating Cheese Itz. So we made a deal that he'd take a hand job so I could eat them too.
I've got five complains from the landlord about she being too loud during sex in two weeks I'm marrying her
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