like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
I drove you home. there is no excuse for wrecking your car 3 hours later.
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
When I sent you a text telling you to splash water on your face, you texted me back with 'Iwehre N qyull.'
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
Going to the bathroom drunk while wearing overalls is such a struggle
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
Also mom is not happy about me telling her how much i want the women sprinters on the Olympics to beat me up
Is it weird that I'm smoking a cig on my back patio in a sports bra and underwear?
Too high to wash a dish but just high enough for a kitchen fire
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