p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
There's a fat drunk walrus bitch here next to me and shes already puked and now falling on herself
OH FUCK NOW HER BOYFRIEND IS MAKING OUT WITH HER VOMIT HOLE
Sounds like a good blink 182 concert...
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
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I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
I have reached the state of intoxication where it is now a requirement to sit while peeing.
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
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I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
If those panties could talk.
"Once upon a time, Jenny got chlamydia from a magician. The end."
Who's phone is in my pants and why did I wake up clutching a handle of vlad?
Even if they did assume we were doing kinky shit, it's not like they're gonna be like, "HALT SATAN! INTAKE SOME JESUS AND VOMIT YOUR SINS!"
Randomize