Are you dead
Yes
Oh man
Someone fed me too many chicken nuggets and sexed me too hard
In the future we'll all be gay
dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This situation is one cop call away from being a Lifetime movie.
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
THE VODKA TRAIN IS NOW PULLING INTO THE STATION
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
Pretty sure I scared her away last night by putting a vodka tampon in my ass
This is going to be so stupid, but do you feel the calluses on my hands when I give you a handy?
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