hdsncx Gizmo asnqw toilet blanasdi
ok, stay where you are, be there soon
Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
Just got a orange juice for my grandma, put gin in it without thinking. She's having a good morning.
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
He came on me while singing crank dat like soulja boy, fuck our sex life has reached a whole new level of low
Just had a dream about an abnormally large bottle of tequila. No more depressed drinking for me.
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
She was stumbling around looking for her cat. She said i could help, but i had to call him by his jungle name
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
I like how I just yelled in the window at Mcdonalds drive thru, got his number and then fucked. it was like I ordered a happy meal that only can be had after midnight.
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
Randomize
