think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
i woke up under my mattress pad with him laying naked next to me and his wwjd bracelet on my nightstand.
nice, that's exactly what jesus would do.
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
Turns out I wasn't throwing up blood, I just threw up so hard it ripped my tonsils. Thank you Jameson.
I'm flagged. Drank strippers water. Flashed Dave tryin to get a job here. You order the shots. Green tea betch.
Just beat off to internet porn while talking to my mom on the phone and eating a cinnamon roll. U have 5 minutes to get on my level
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
Was Mr. ROBOT good? I missed it. I just fucked dental hygienist on the trampoline in my backyard
I got so drunk last night I took a ice bath with my mother in law
Im about to get an ultrasound of my balls. I hate waiting. Its the worst.
Randomize
