We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
i just practiced my bj skills on a banana in front of the mirror
its going to be a good night
Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
It's great when the cashier at the liquor store asks "weren't you wearing those clothes yesterday"
I felt so bad for you. Drunk Rachael wanted nothing more than to crawl into the cop car and give you a hug. Luckily Mollied/Barred out Rachael convinced Drunk Rachael this was a terrible idea. So I ran. I have your keys btw
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
There’s a special place in hell for tall guys with small dicks
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