this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
When I'm drunk and can't pee, I sing my abc's in my head and try to pee before I get to pee. Last night I forgot to do it in my head
And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
I tried to tell him I love him but it came out something like "We're both fucked up and it works."
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
My landlord showed my apartment to a prospective tenant today and I had my vibrator and gun both chilling on my nightstand
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
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