worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
I woke up next to her this morning and couldn't remember her name. Luckily, she had written it on my hand so that I could add her on facebook.
Well the party says they're going to have three kegs and four trampolines. I think I'm going to invite my EMT buddies just to be safe.
If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
I sang Jenna happy bday in the middle of throw up hurls
I totally just somersaulted to the bathroom to avoid moving out of my fetal position
I don't know if I should be concerned or impressed.
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
I am lonely and hungry. I need a girlfriend, but I'd settle for my mom.
My sobriety has gotten out of control. I think I need an intervention.
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
Randomize
