Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
Most awkward sex ever...
And im texting you in the middle.
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
i was getting a blow-job tonight in the mens bathroom of a bar and the bouncer comes in and says "bro i don't mean to cock block but you cant do that here."
your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
I was puzzled last night that there were shots waiting for us when we got there. Just read my messages and saw you were ordering from the bar via texts.
All I'm asking for is flower occasionally, and in return you get to come home to me naked in heels. Is that to much to ask for?
Can we skip lunch and do power hour sex time from now on? I'll let you eat nachos off my body if you really need the food.
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
Dad just asked me to breathalyze grandma
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
There's tequila in my general area. Please pray for me.
She blew me while I watched the jets game and the hardest thing was deciding what to focus on more
Randomize
