I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
The only thing he got me during our relationship was a cum stain in my backseat. I choose winners.
i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
Just took my pill on time for two days in a row. I deserve a prize.
Not having phil's child is good enough.
We found him pissing on the sidewalk in his socks signing the national anthem. I love you summer.
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
do you ever wish you could like, jerk your heart off and be, like, emotionally satisfied? it'd feel like cuddling.
My roommate definitely just walked in on me playing the piano naked.
By piano you mean.....
Like literally a piano.
Ohhhh that's kind of embarrassing.
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
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