I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
You're the only person i know who can laugh and talk while puking
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
If you're trying to piece together your night, I can tell you where those tassels came from.
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
I WAS CONCIEVED IN THE BACK OF MY CAR. THATS HOW OLD THIS CAR IS.
...how and why.
PARENTS ARE MAGIC.
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
Your next boyfriend should be from MENSA...you're so smart, it's intimidating as fuck. My penis retracted in fear.
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
There are flour footprints all over the house. Either u guys are trying to pull that Paranormal Activity shit on me again, or u got drunk and tried to make pancakes.
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
Randomize
